Dear MOTIVATION: I feel drained and disgusted at work due to a toxic co-worker. I just smile and tolerate her negativity, and take on the workload of two people to make up for the work she refuses to do to maintain the peace. It bothers me that she earns the same pay while contributing so little and disrupting the workplace day after day. I worry that if I speak up, she will turn against me or make my life and the workplace feel even more like hell. What can I do to advocate for myself and others while addressing this issue safely? Please HELP! I want to find a solution without escalating the situation further.  — DRAINED AND DISGUSTED IN ALASKA 

DEAR DRAINED AND DISGUSTED: It’s understandable to feel overwhelmed by a difficult and toxic co-worker. One of my coined thoughts for positive employees like you is that the employee who steadily smiles and peak performs while working with a difficult and sometimes toxic coworker proves that they are in control of their happiness, peace of mind, and emotional regulation.

Start by documenting specific incidents that demonstrate her behavior and how it affects your work and the workplace. Setting boundaries calmly is important; consider speaking to a manager or HR, presenting your concerns without blaming her directly. You might also seek support from colleagues who share your experience. It’s important to prioritize your well-being, so make sure you carve out time for self-care outside of work. Remember, addressing toxicity is ultimately about creating a healthier and safe work environment for everyone.